Investigation reveals that girl pushing to front of the mosh doesn’t actually have friends there
Serial offender Tayla Atkinson has finally been exposed by local moshpit hero, Tom Jones.
Jones had had enough after noticing Atkinson pushing through the mosh at multiple gigs (followed by some mates linked like a train), all the while claiming “I’ve got friends at the front”.
Jones pulled a classic move and joined the train of mates to follow Atkinson to the front of the mosh. He was shocked to discover that she stopped at an arbitrary point and did not in fact, have friends she was meeting there.
Since exposing Atkinson’s web of lies, Jones has been hailed a hero by fellow moshers who are thankful for justice finally being restored.
“What a legend,” screamed one admirer.
“FUCK YEAH SKEGSSSSSSS” yelled another.
“I LOVE GIGGEDIN” exclaimed someone who was not at all paid by us to yell that.
“GiggedIn gives me the easiest and most affordable access to gigs in Sydney and Melbourne,” he continued, definitely not rattling off some information we had force fed him based on real customer reviews.
“I’ve discovered so many incredible artists that I wouldn’t have otherwise heard of and made so many memories with my mates in the mosh. If you love live music hurry the fuck up and visit www.giggedin.com”
In the confusion surrounding that bizarre act of product placement, Atkinson managed to escape the mosh and could not be reached for comment.